Your child is struggling in math. Not failing, but... not doing great either.

Maybe they're getting 70s-75s. Maybe homework takes hours. Maybe the teacher said they're "a bit behind."

You're wondering: Do they really need a tutor? Or am I overreacting?

After working with 80+ families, here's how to know:

7 Signs Your Child Needs a Tutor (Not Just Extra Help)

Sign 1: Homework Takes Way Too Long

If math homework that should take 30 minutes takes 2+ hours, something's wrong.

This isn't about being slow. It means they're struggling with EVERY problem, needing to figure out each one from scratch.

Why it matters: They're not building automaticity. Every problem feels new. That's a foundation gap, not a "needs more time" issue.

When to get a tutor: If this has been happening for 4+ weeks consistently.

Sign 2: They Say "I Don't Get It" Even After You Explain

You sit down, explain the concept. They nod. You do an example together. They get it.

Next problem? "I don't know how to do this."

It's the exact same type of problem. They can't apply what you just taught.

Why it matters: They're not seeing patterns. Each problem looks unique to them. That's a conceptual gap.

When to get a tutor: If you've explained the same concept 3+ times and it's still not clicking.

Sign 3: Test Scores Don't Match Homework Grades

They get 90s-100s on homework (with your help or Google), but 60s-70s on tests (without support).

This is classic: they can follow instructions step-by-step, but don't actually understand underlying concepts.

Why it matters: They're memorizing procedures, not building understanding. When test changes wording slightly, they're lost.

When to get a tutor: If gap between homework and test scores is 15+ points consistently.

Sign 4: They Avoid Math or Have Emotional Meltdowns

Crying. Shutting down. "I can't do this. I'm stupid."

Or: Avoiding. "I forgot my homework." "The teacher didn't explain it."

This isn't laziness. It's anxiety from repeated failure.

Why it matters: They've lost confidence. Confidence doesn't come back on its own—needs success experiences.

When to get a tutor: Immediately. Math anxiety gets worse with time, not better.

Sign 5: Teacher Says They're "Behind Grade Level"

If teacher says: "Your child is working below grade level" or "They're missing foundational skills," that's code for: "They have gaps I can't address in class."

Teachers can't stop class to re-teach 4th grade fractions when class is on 7th grade algebra.

Why it matters: Gaps don't fix themselves. They widen as content builds on foundations they don't have.

When to get a tutor: As soon as teacher mentions "below grade level." Don't wait for "they'll catch up."

Sign 6: You Don't Remember the Math Yourself

You look at their homework. You have no idea how to solve it.

Or you remember vaguely but can't explain it clearly.

You Google solutions. You follow steps. But you can't help them understand WHY.

Why it matters: Your child needs someone who can explain concepts clearly, not just show answers.

When to get a tutor: If you're Googling every homework problem or can't explain the reasoning.

Sign 7: They Used to Be Fine, But Suddenly Struggling

4th-5th grade: They did okay. Not amazing, but passing.

6th-7th grade: Suddenly drowning.

This is typical. Elementary math is memorization. Middle school is conceptual. Different skillset.

Why it matters: The gap between where they are and where they need to be is growing every week.

When to get a tutor: As soon as you notice the drop. Don't wait for it to "stabilize."

When You DON'T Need a Tutor (Yet)

Not every struggle means tutor time. Here's when to wait:

They're Getting 80s-90s But Want Higher

If they're already doing well and just want to improve to 95+, that's nice-to-have, not need.

Try: More practice problems at home. Khan Academy. Office hours with teacher.

Tutor if: They want test prep for SAT/SHSAT/Regents. That's strategic, worth investment.

It's Been Less Than 2 Weeks on a New Topic

New units are always confusing at first. Give it 2-3 weeks.

If after a full unit (3-4 weeks) they still don't get it? Then consider tutoring.

They Do Fine When They Focus, But Get Distracted

If the issue is attention/focus rather than understanding, a tutor won't fix it.

Try: Shorter study sessions. Break problems into chunks. Remove distractions.

Tutor if: Distraction stems from frustration because they don't understand. Then yes, tutoring helps.

Parent Help vs. Tutor: What's the Difference?

Parent Help Works When:

You understand the math yourself
Your child accepts help from you (many don't)
Gaps are minor (less than 6 months behind)
You have 30-60 min daily to help consistently

Tutor is Better When:

You don't know the math or can't explain it
Your child shuts down when you try to help
Gaps are significant (1+ years behind)
You don't have consistent time
Child needs external accountability

What About Free Resources (Khan Academy, YouTube)?

Great supplemental tools. But limitations:

Pros:

Free
On-demand
Good explanations

Cons:

One-size-fits-all
No diagnosis of specific gaps
No accountability
No personalization
Passive watching ≠ active learning

Use them for: Reviewing specific topics they missed in class.

Don't rely on them for: Catching up from significant gaps or building foundation systematically.

How to Choose the Right Tutor

Not all tutors are equal. Here's what matters:

1. Do They Diagnose Before Teaching?

Good tutors start with assessment: "Where exactly are the gaps?"

Bad tutors jump into current homework without understanding root issues.

Ask: "How do you assess what my child needs?"

2. Do They Explain WHY, Not Just HOW?

Good tutors: "Here's why this method works. Let me show you the concept."

Bad tutors: "Just follow these steps. Memorize this."

Ask: "What's your teaching approach?"

3. Do They Communicate Progress to Parents?

Good tutors: Send updates. "Here's what we're working on. Here's the progress."

Bad tutors: Show up, tutor, leave. You have no idea what happened.

Ask: "How do you keep parents informed?"

4. Are They Flexible to Your Child's Learning Style?

Good tutors: Adapt. Visual learner? Use diagrams. Needs repetition? Drill problems.

Bad tutors: One method for everyone.

Ask: "How do you adapt to different learning styles?"

Cost Breakdown (NYC Area)

What to expect:

Group tutoring: $30-50/hour (less personalized)
College student tutors: $40-70/hour (hit or miss quality)
Experienced tutors: $75-125/hour (worth it for serious gaps)
Test prep specialists: $100-200/hour (for SAT/SHSAT/Regents)

Most families need 1-2 sessions/week for 3-6 months to see major improvement.

Action Plan: What to Do This Week

Assess how many "signs" apply - If 3+, strongly consider tutoring
Request teacher conference - Ask: "What specific skills is my child missing?"
Try parent help for 2 weeks - Can you make progress together?
If no improvement, get a tutor - Don't wait longer

Final Thought

Getting a tutor isn't admitting failure. It's strategic intervention.

Think of it like physical therapy: If your child sprained an ankle, you wouldn't just say "walk it off." You'd get PT to rebuild strength properly.

Math gaps are the same. They need targeted, expert help to rebuild foundation.

I've seen students go from hating math to loving it. From 60s to 90s. From "I'm bad at math" to "I got this."

But it required intervention. The gap doesn't close itself.

If you're seeing the signs, trust your gut. Get help. Your child (and their future self) will thank you.

How to Know If Your Child Actually Needs a Math Tutor